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Heroin

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This is what I'm going with. It sounds like a weird mix of "come" and "gone" but "gone" definitely makes more sense. Now that her friends have left, she's alone and wants to leave...idk about the staying another year part, maybe it's complacency/ comfort in routine

 

To me, the "gone" makes a lot more sense, although I can hear "come" too but I am also going with "gone"

 

I think the staying another year part is her wanting to leave but because she is so confused about what she actually wants, she will probably stay until she figures things out 


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To me, the "gone" makes a lot more sense, although I can hear "come" too but I am also going with "gone"

 

I think the staying another year part is her wanting to leave but because she is so confused about what she actually wants, she will probably stay until she figures things out 

This makes the song even more relatable tbh..

 

I don't mind the static, it's one little detail.


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This probably isn't what Lana meant, but here's what I get from these lines that make the song more emotional for me:

 

I wanna leave, I'll probably stay another year.

 

For me, it's almost like a suicidal person could have written it. When I was suicidal a few years back I always told myself I should hang on to life just to see if things would change in the next year, so I hung on. So those lines resonate with me in a way. I wanted to leave this world, but I stayed, just to see if things would change.

 

Yes

All of this - yes

Also the fact that she still embraces inner peace so she wants to wait until she sorts things out before she says goodbye to the life she knew and in general of course and kind of greets death like an old friend rather than kill herself out of desperation


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For me the fact that she references Manson and the murders (writing in blood on my walls and shit) is just for the sake of referencing. It seems like she just wrote the lyrics in a way that everyone can have their own interpretation rather than trying to tell us a story in this song. That's the thing with "meaningless" music: it forces you to create your own meaning.

 

I think this song isn't really focusing on the whole Manson thing. But if we really want to get into this we should consider the theme of the last three songs of the album: changing. I think she references heroin here not as in the drug itself, but as in the things that you hold on to the most in your life or a certain lifestyle that isn't really good for you. She wants to take the airplane the same way everyone else in her life did and leave for somewhere else, but she still feels like staying in the same place she is, which can mean emotionaly or even phisically. She hopes to come back again to see how changes she is now and how she was such a simple iniciative left such a huge impact in her life. And if you have this in mind when listening to the last three songs you can see the pattern of someone who is trying to change, who feels ready for a change and is finally able to move out of the black into the blue. If this is the case I'm quite proud of Lana for delivering such a powerful theme in such a majestic way.

 

So, in a nutshell:

 

And all my friends have gone
'Cause they still feel him here

 

Everyone in her life have left her so she feels like letting go of what pushes them away.

 

I want to leave
I'll probably stay another year

It's hard to live, when absolutely nothing's clear

 

She isn't really sure about how she'll be able to do that or even if she wants to.

 

I'm getting on that aeroplane
Leaving my old man again
I hope, that I'd come back one day

To tell you that I
Really changed

 

Now she's the one getting on the "airplane" (which I asume is getting in control of her own life instead of letting it be ruled by other things/people) and leaving her lifestyle for good and planning to come back to see how it all changed.

 

I'd be lying, if I said I wasn't sick of it

 

And that's why she decides to risk everything just to be someone better than she was. She couldn't take it anymore but now she is strong enough to fight for a better reality for herself and for the ones around her, where she can finally be honest, capable, beautiful (she already is), and stable.

 

 

 

Well, this is just a theory though I came up with after analysing the lyrics a little further. If anyone wants to add something or if agree or desagree with all this nonsense just let me know.


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Here is my alternate interpretation of the lyrics. I believe that this song is talking about letting go of the past and embracing the future, through the lens of a lost relationship (Barrie if I had to guess) and some of the Manson references we've already talked about a lot. Hear me out! I think the storyline here is she is up awake at night in her home, restlessly thinking about the past and looking to the future. This is SO long - sorry!

 


“Topanga’s hot tonight.” We all know the connection here to Manson, but I don’t know if anyone has brought up the fact that Lana’s Malibu home (HBTB one) is pretty much where Topanga meets PCH (promise I’m not a stalker, I live in LA and you can’t miss her house when you've seen it once!). If you loosely interpret the area that is considered Topanga, Lana may be making this observation from inside her very own home.

“Rumbling of distant shores sends me to sleep/but the facts of life can sometimes make it hard to dream.” She is trying to sleep but can’t, because she’s thinking about how “life rocked [her]”, and everything in the lines leading to the chorus. Rumbling of distant shores makes me think she’s near the water, aka her house.

“Flying to the moon again/dreaming..” she’s caught up in her memories about heroin and the man she lost. The lines about an airplane to a foreign land make me think Barrie, since it sounds like she sent this person away rather than them leaving her. Her calling heroin out specifically in the chorus and how it ruined someone’s life makes me think this is not some metaphor for her own use, or else she would keep it vague like the rest.

“Manson’s in the air.” This isn’t explicit, but I take the purpose of this line (and all of the Manson references) to talk about how sinister parts of history can sometimes linger in a place, much like the memories of her lost love linger in her thoughts. I think this explains the whole second verse. Side note: when she says “they still feel him here”, I think “him” refers to the man she was in a relationship with. Think of it as: “all my friends have gone because they can sense that this man’s absence is still affecting me when I’m here”.

The second prechorus vaguely mentions something bad happened at the beginning of the year (or possibly last year). The fact that the very next line mentions heavy metal, makes me think the event is connected to a musician, of which she has had many relationships with.

“Its fucking hot”, I see her getting frustrated with not being able to shake her thoughts. Like being up at night when its hot and you don’t have AC. In comes the Manson reference, and again the parallel with history giving a place a bad feeling. I also feel like there's some duality here about how, even though Topanga does have this dark history attached to it, like Lana, that she still feels like the future is in her hands and that she can "change her evil ways and shit" even after "writing in blood on the walls". It seems like symbolism for reclaiming her life from the negative things that the past has attached to it. 

 

I think the “marzipan” line is some inside hint to whomever she’s singing about – she mentioned there were references only she knew in an interview. There’s a million other words she could have used there, so this feels like something is hidden beneath but we’ll never know. Finally the “taking all my medicine/to take my thoughts away” leads back into her being immersed in her thoughts about the past, since presumably all of the song before this has been her inner mind’s dialogue. I’m still thinking about the significance of “leaving my old man again/I hope that I’ll come back one day” – but I do think these lines in this part of the song make the best moment on the album, and one of the best of her career.

The rest has already been covered, but the lines “I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t sick of it” to me say that she’d tired of thinking about the past and these people that don’t belong in her future. This ties in with the desire to change and to move on with her life.

This was really long but I love this song so much and I actually think the lyrics are pretty straightforward for what the song is about.

As for a video: I would love love love to see a video of her walking around the Malibu home at night, cut in some dream sequences and shots of the ocean at night, and transition into full on dreaming in a triple feature with Change and Get Free. She wakes up and its morning as the ocean sounds from Get Free start. I had a whole thing fleshed out for a triple feature video but this is enough for now lol.

 


Goddesses don't speak in whispers. They scream.

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There's a very interesting comment on genius.com about a possible meaning:

 

“Jumping off from the walls, into the docks and shit”

The above are the correct lyrics for latter part of bridge, clarified by Apple Music. Below is my research in support of the correction.

Lana is referencing the 1969 Tate/Manson Murders:

“Topanga’s hot today, Manson’s in the air”, “Writin' in blood on my walls and shit”.

Lana is a fan of The Beach Boys, she references their 1964 hit “Don’t Worry Baby” at the end of “Love”.

Charles Manson (Cult Leader) befriended Dennis Wilson of The Beach Boys in the late 60s in hopes that Wilson would be able to help him secure a recording contract. For a time the Manson Family lived with Wilson in his mansion, there they took extensive advantage of Wilson’s famous generosity, threw chaotic-drug fuelled parties, ran up expensive bills and crashed one of his cars.

Wilson eventually had the
Family evicted from his home, and despite his best efforts wasn’t able to convince his brothers or music industry ties that Charles Manson was worthy of signing.

This infuriated Manson who dreamed of using rock-stardom as a means of sharing his twisted message of a looming apocalyptic race war, misogyny and violence decided Wilson would “have to pay”.

Though Manson never exerted his revenge on Wilson after the perceived betrayal, the episode haunted Wilson until the end of his life, in fact, he practically refused to speak about it. It is believed Wilson’s paranoia over Manson sending a cult member to kill him inflamed his alcoholism and drug use which marred him until the end of his life.

On December 28th 1983 Dennis Wilson died.

He jumped, drunkenly, from the dock into the waters of the MARINA DEL REY.

Don't know how reliable it could be because I don't know anything about Dennis Wilson.

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imo she references heroin literally from a visual, mood-setting pov, but mostly as a metaphor for her own fame, the love/hate relationship she has with it & the people she lost bc of it. most of the song reflects the duality of wanting to leave something but not being able to resist it, or how the very thing that makes her feel good also ruins her life. these verses are the most telling imo:

 

Life rocked me like Mötley Grabbed me by the ribbons in my hair

I'm flyin' to the moon again, dreamin' about heroin How it gave you everything and took your life away
I want to leave, I'll probably stay another year It's hard to leave when absolutely nothin's clear

 

the aeroplane is both a word play on getting high ("Taking all my medicine to take my thoughts away I'm getting on that aeroplane") & possibly a reference to someone close to her who didn't like the invasion of privacy and scrutiny that fame brought along and decided to reject it, leaving her in the process as well, and also how isolating fame can be ("I put you on the aeroplane, destined for a foreign land I thought that you'd come back again", "all my friends have gone")

 

she uses the Manson allusions as the backdrop to all this bc she loves her dark pop culture & culty stuff (stars, they're just like us!), but the interesting thing is that she seems to sing about it from multiple povs: that of the victims ("Oh, writin' in blood on my walls and shit", which references both the Manson murderers famously writing in blood on their victims' walls & possibly her own home invasion and stalker problem as yet another downside of fame - "I'd be lyin' if I said I wasn't sick of it"), that of panicked Hollywood elite back in 69 who thought Manson was coming for them ("Topanga's hot today, Manson's in the air And all my friends have gone, 'cause they still feel him here") & that of a Manson follower ("Somethin' 'bout the city Don't know what it is, it makes my head get crazy", this after mentioning "Somethin' 'bout this sun has made these kids get scary" in the previous bridge just before the bloody walls part, which clearly referenced The Family). imo Manson himself is just as much a metaphor for the irresistible allure vs destructiveness of fame as heroin is.

 

this song really shows how much she's evolved as a songwriter.

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I also believe heroin is just a metaphor for fame (Shoot it up straight to the heart pls!).

 

Remember when VG blew up she talked about wanting to be a one-hit-wonder. And after BtD she claimed to have said everything she wanted to say. I believe Lana knew even before she gained recognition how cruel fame could be. Her plan was to make a mark and leave. Hoping to come back as the same person (Chorus). She took the ride because she has been trying for too long being a struggling musician. The whole SNL drama, the backlash it was even worse than she expected (Bridge). I actually think the Mason stuff is also about the stalkers invading her privacy. Topanga ironically is LDR dreamland, everything she sang about pre-fame and probably everything she wanted to be a part of (Verse 1) but none of the people she has met actually represent the community she was longing for (Ride Monologue -> "all my friends are gone" Verse 2 Heroin) The "I'll stay another year" is her wanting to leave this life. The thing is even if she leaves fame behind she won't be the same person "dreaming about heroin" off to a foreign land. She changed and she will never go back. The good thing is instead of changing for the worse she changed for the better(Chorus 2). I believe she matured a lot in the past year or two, she ditched the submissive female being left by my man storyline and there's also no glamourization of drugs or abusive relationships. And I think that was a very conscious decision due to self-reflecting her actions and art.

 

Also Get Free and Heroin are a pair imo. "I'm want to get off but I keep riding the ride" vs.

"I want to leave, I'll stay another year"

 

Crowley vs Mason Family

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I feel that Heroin is a song of outburst, redemption, as if she were confessing all her sins and everything wrong she has already done and repents, and then in Change comes guilt and shame, and the attempt to redeem herself and be someone better.


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am i the only one that think shes mentioning Manson because he had a legion of fans that went completely berzerk over everything he said and she's probably completely afraid of that happening to her?

 

 

 

also i feel like this verse

 

"And all my friends have gone, 'cause they still feel him here

I want to leave, I'll probably stay another year"

 

is about how she notices how her true friends see somehow "a bit of Manson" in her persona (cult leader) and becoz of that she wants to drop everything (her career) and become a "normal" person again, leave the spotlights etc but she basically cannot?

 

 

tl;dr -- i feel like this song is about her influence over her fans, the obsessive ones and its literally out of her control because they see this persona, not her real self

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So,

 

The rumblin' from distant shores sends me to sleep
But the facts of life can sometimes make it hard to dream

Life rocked me like Mötley

Grabbed me by the ribbons in my hair

Life rocked me ultra-softly

Like the heavy metal that you wear

 

I'm flyin' to the moon again, dreamin' about heroin
How it gave you everything and took your life away
I put you on an aeroplane, destined for a foreign land
I hoped that you'd come back again
And tell me everything's okay

 

She's going to sleep but she can't forget what she did: she gave her bf a good dose of heroin, wanting to take him to a foreign lane but killed him from an overdose,

am i ok?

 

I'm flyin' to the moon again, dreamin' about marzipan
Taking all my medicine to take my thoughts away
I'm getting on that aeroplane, leavin' my old man again
I hope that I come back one day
To tell you that I really changed
, baby

 

She takes medicine because she can't cope with the guilt, yet she hopes to see him again (in the afterlife?) to tell him everything's ok, maybe ask for forgiveness?? idk, not saying this happened in real life tho, or did it? :illumilana:


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Do u think it is related? “Bad beginning to my new year” and “how it gave you everything and took your life away”

https://twitter.com/lanadelrey/status/153573739542482944?lang=en the song being about Rob, her ex who died from a heroin overdose at the end of 2011.

http://lanaboards.com/index.php?/topic/1088-lana-and-shiny-toy-guns/?p=597654 

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Half the song is definitely about rob but I also believe some of it is about how crazy her life has gotten now with her referencing her several stalkers/obsessed fans with crazy kids,into docks and writing blood on my walls it seems like she's alluding to it.

I also believe when she references getting on the airplane to see him I believe that means she still visits his grave and probably talks to him.

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