ayyeet

Hi, another small interpretation of Lana’s songs, knowing that A&W is most likely about Sean: “Got a cop who turned on the back beat Puts the shower on while he calls me Sneaks out the back door to talk to me I'm invisible, you should’ve told me Did you really think I would spare your/her tears just to save your happiness? When I had no idea you were engaged. After all of those years, do you think I’d spare their tears to save my face? You must not have known who you were dealing with.” It seems like A&W is about Sean Larkin, and a few other songs of hers, like Blue Banisters and Chemtrails Over the Country Club. Based on those lyrics, Sean literally made her the “American Whore” by still seeing her when he was engaged, but what’s interesting is that if COTCC is about him, if you pick up the symbolism from the music video in the breaking glass/mirror scene at 4:30, she sings “my cancer is sun and my leo is moon”, while breaking through glass and appearing completely unaltered and unbothered. She then turns into a wolf in the next scene, which wolves are known to symbolize freedom, intuition, courage, and self-reliance. Also, at 4:07 she sings “it’s never too late, baby so don’t give up”, with a scene of her in a car with her hands surrendering into a tornado that is pulling the car up in the sky. This imagery and symbolism, as well as the lyrics themselves show a spiritual surrendering to what fulfills her soul. And writing about her relationships is connected to that, even if they may be tumultuous. That’s where she’s needed, that’s where she’s wild and free— almost like her pain in her music from her experiences is healing herself and the world. It’s also interesting that if this is true, the imagery of her walking and breaking the glass symbolizes her not giving a fuck what anyone thinks of her— (also interesting how this theme is mentioned over and over again, such as in the Ride monologue— identifying more with freedom and being crazy than to live an unfulfilling life) she’s gonna follow where her soul leads her, at the expense of her image. Thus claiming the title of the “American Whore”, ironically.

Hi! I wrote an in-depth analysis of the meaning of A&W, and would like to share it here. A&W is almost about embracing the title of being America's whore-- in a playful yet vindictive way. She's literally saying with this song that's what she's known for in America-- with her image-- "my love making is my legacy". However, with this song, it's a little bit different in the tone. She seems to be in love with this man who is married/dating another woman, and keeps seeing him regardless. It seems like they both know that they have a deep connection, as he will do whatever he can to see her, yet she sings "your mom called, I told her, you're fucking up big time" in a playful yet accepting way. With that comical line, it seems as if everyone agrees (even his own mom) that he's fucking up big time by not being with her. Yet she accepts not having him, as he still won't choose her: "but I don't care baby, I already lost my mind". As an empathic and sensitive person myself, her sensitivity/femininity comes through all of her songs. That's part of why she's so good at composing songs that ring deep to many fans. This one is not an exception. A&W is not about a sex addiction, in fact quite the opposite-- she always had a deep longing for a soulful type of connection of love. In Did you know that there's a tunnel under Ocean Blvd, she sings "when's it gonna be my turn? Open me up, tell me you like it, fuck me to death, love me until I love myself", which seems to be about the same man that A&W is about. In contrast to A&W, she sings the melody in a sad yet hopeful way as she sings "don't forget me, like the tunnel under Ocean Blvd"-- but it may not be as hopeful as we think, as the tunnel under Ocean Blvd is sealed up (implying that she just might be forgotten). In a contrasting way, she sings in A&W: "call him up, come into my bedroom, ended up, we fuck on the hotel floor... It's not about having someone to love me anymore, this is the experience of being an American whore". She simply accepts being the side piece, while still being totally in love with this man, as we hear just after revealing how she was raped and how no one would believe her, she sings in a deep and sad voice: "on top of this (how she fucked up her story with her image-- will discuss later), so many other things you can't believe... Did you know a singer can still be lookin' like a side piece at 33? God's a charlatan, don't look back, babe". You can hear the pain in her voice in the first half, yet it quickly turns into an accepting voice, when she says "God's a charlatan", as in "I love him but he won't choose me, I'm helpless-- but I accept that I'll do this and this is what I'll be known for: the American whore". And there's almost a small pride in that. In her wildness. Look closely as she sings "los[ing] my mind", "I am fucking crazy, but I am free" (Ride monologue), "I'm not unhinged or unhappy, I'm still so strange and wild" (Chemtrails Over The Country Club). In COTCC, she also sings "I want you only like when we were kids under the chemtrails and country club, it's never too late, baby so don't give up", which, sidenote, "did you know a singer can still be lookin' like a side piece at 33" also points to how she has sung about this man for years, even dating back to her childhood in New York. In COTCC she encourages him to not give up on her, just like in DYKTTATUOB she says: "don't forget me". But in A&W she comes to terms with not being chosen by him, yet there's almost a feeling like that's what her life path is-- to be wild, free, and untamed, opposing society (will get to this), and creatively expressing herself in that way. In the Ride monologue, she says "I was born to be the other woman, who belonged to no one, who belonged to everyone, who had nothing, who wanted everything, with a fire for every experience and an obsession for freedom that terrified me". Another part of her sensitivity and fondness for love comes through when the song musically builds up during this part, right after mentioning several ways in which he visits/talks to her in a way that avoids getting caught from cheating: "Puts the shower on while he calls me, sneaks out the back door to talk to me, I'm invisible, look how you hold me, I'm invisible, I'm invisible, I'm a ghost now, look how they found me". In an almost tragic and desperate way, she describes herself as "invisible", and points to how this man has such a hold on her-- so much so that she feels "invisible" to him. It really reveals her submission to this man, how submissive she can be, in a strangely positive way, as she will continue to see him, since "it's not about having someone to love me anymore, no this is the experience of being an American whore". She's submissive to him because she loves him but he won't choose her. In an interesting and contrasting way, the second part of the song with the upbeat melody of "Jimmy, Jimmy cocoa puff" points to how it's really not that tragic after all-- this part of the song has a very playful idgaf attitude (supporting this need of hers to be wild, free, and untamed, that this is her life path): "love me if you love or not, you can be my light, Jimmy only love me when he wanna get high... your mom called, I told her, you're fucking up big time... but I don't care, baby I already lost my mind". The other part to A&W is about society's image of her and all of the ways she has "fucked up" her story, which includes her controversies. "I mean, look at me, look at the length of my hair and my face, the shape of my body, do you really think I give a damn what I do after years of just hearin' them talking?" points to how she was criticized in the media for gaining weight, but gaining weight can also be seen as something that increases sex appeal. She sings "this is the experience of an American whore", and then right after "I mean, look at me", which shows how she's basically saying "of course I'm the American whore-- look at me" (not only physically, but about my other songs and controversies). She then says right after "if I told you that I was raped, do you really think that anybody would think I didn't ask for it? I didn't ask for it, I won't testify, I already fucked up my story". She has sung before about being in abusive relationships: "He hit me and it felt like a kiss, Jim brought me back, reminded me of when we were kids" (Ultraviolence), where the media criticized her for "glamorizing abuse", and where the same name is used in the second part of A&W: "Jimmy only love me when he wanna get high". This could possibly suggest that she was actually raped by the person A&W is about, which complicates it even further, and makes sense why she "won't testify", and how she "already fucked up [her] story". Also, the play on calling herself an American whore is an interesting and ironic toss when she reveals in this song that she was raped. At this point, she feels she has messed up her story so much so that now she’s claiming this title, yet still remaining in her delicate, authentic and playful self. The other part to this is her controversies, one of them being her Instagram post dealing with femininity. In this deemed controversial post that was deleted, she says: "Now that [a bunch of female pop stars] have had number ones with songs about being sexy, wearing no clothes, fucking, cheating, etc... Can I please go back to singing about being embodied, feeling beautiful by being in love even if the relationship is not perfect... without being crucified or saying that I'm glamorizing abuse????... there has to be a place in feminism for women who look and act like me - the kind of woman who says no but men hear yes- the kind of women who are slated mercilessly for being their authentic, delicate selves". The way the media has criticized and viewed her throughout the years has been turbulent and with misguided or misunderstood perspectives. This is why she won't testify-- she already fucked up her story, but it's really the media's fault. I can see where she's coming from because she's good at heart and has pure intentions yet gets casted as someone that is quite the opposite, as someone that has "set women back hundreds of years". The last part about A&W and other songs like Wildflower Wildfire I'll mention is about her family and lineage. She has said in one of her Instagram livestreams that looking into her lineage is something not to do alone, and generally suggests that there's something going on there, most likely in terms of troubling relationships. In Wildflower Wildfire, she sings "my father never stepped in when his wife would rage at me... So I turn but I learn, not to turn into a wildfire, to light up your night, with only my smile and nothing that hurts... I live on sheer willpower, I promise that nothing will burn you... Like the others baby burns, burns, burns... It's you from whom I learn". She seems to try to not repeat any damaging acts in relationships that have seemingly run through her lineage, and promises to be better, in terms of a stable and loving relationship. In A&W she sings "I haven't seen my mother in a long, long time" and "called up one, drunk, called up another, Forensic Files wasn't on, watching Teenage Diary of a Girl, wondering what went wrong, I'm a princess, I'm divisive, ask me why why why I'm like this, maybe I'm just kind of like this, I don't know maybe I'm just like this". She seems to be reflecting on "what went wrong" with her, why she "called up one [then] called up another", why she's "divisive", and why she's okay with being America's whore. How much of it is tied to her lineage? But as mentioned previously, it seems as if this is where she thrives with being wild and free, and creatively expressing herself with this life path. Overall, this song is very interesting in that it almost concludes all of her previous work, by stating how she's the American whore and that's what she's accepted herself as and is known and will be known for, in a vindictive and sarcastic way, as well as in a powerfully wild, free, and expressively healing way, even if it is ironic: being totally submissive to this man that'll ruin his life to cheat with her, yet not fully choosing her, and expressing this in a song that is kind of like a fuck you to society by claiming the title of the "American whore" (as she is rightfully resentful of the media/society for how they treated her-- and as she comes more from a person that seeks true love rather than meaningless sex, like what a "whore" would actually seek) and one that points to her liveliness of being wild and free, albeit totally submissively at the control of this man (for now lol). That was so much writing and analysis from a long time Lana fan lol, but I enjoy sharing it.