LoreleiLee

That is Scarlett O'Hara look: (behind flowery girlish innocenct capriciousness - horns in disguise )

I don't quite get how everybody claims that with UV she finally managed to find her own artistical signature and freedom to express her real self and the BTD is supposedly a dirty sell-out. Like, desert and psychedelic rock and more raw sound is more authentical than hip-hop and upbeat, poppy, cheerful music. Even I, who am deep into alternative, indie and underground, will deny that and maybe too bravely conclude that BTD was also her true self, only different facet, maybe because she was, as some member accentuated on the theme about Honeymoon, happier then, at least she seemed to be. (Btw. I love both albums equally.) And if UV was her holy grail of authenticity and she got critical acclaim for it, how come she was so dispirited at that time, not willing to promote it, and seemingly depressed and ill? Maybe it is the dark and moody chambers of the soul that derived that gem piece in the first place (obviously), but I'm playing with the thought that in BTD era she was still excited about ascending , she was in a state of sweet anticipation of success but when she somehow reached the top with approval of UV, she realized that the top is a lonely place, as they say for all kingdoms and thrones. But on the other side, it is inherent to almost every artist to reveal him/herself to the audience and be loved, worshipped, adored or respected, to receive feedback and to share their most profound, hidden and troubling thoughts, feelings and wounds with the universe. I mean, artists are all to some degree exhibitionists and even the most timid yearn for attention, but she shuts herself so firmly in her shell, like unreachable pearl, or some deity, almost Buddha that escaped to the mountain. That is why she is so contradictory, controversial and enigmatic, and why I'm so ardently ambivalent towards her, despite the amount of affection I nourish for her precious art. Maybe it's Kurt Cobain's curse (not literally) – he was disgusted by the fact Nirvana headed on feverishly towards mainstream. He commited suicide, and Lana isolates herself and freezes. I know I'm exaggerating; I should just let her alone with her creative juices flow freely and ferment in her hermetically sealed castle of mind. I hope this is just standstill before new storm. Edit - I just realized I talk gibberish - she progresses the opposite way than Nirvana did, but still...Maybe with introverts it is about paralyzing fear when others expect too much of you - all the stars, meteors and milky ways.

Violet - Hole Evening of Light - Nico

Paralelly with previous, I am prepairing for "Wide Sargasso Sea" by Jean Rhys and would terribly love to consequently explore "The Madwoman In The Attic: the Woman Writer And Nineteenth-Century Literary Imagination" by Sandra Gilbert and Susan Gubar. I have read "Ariel" and collected poems of Sylvia Plath, as well as her "Johnny Panic And The Bible Of Dreams" and "The Bell Jar", but I yearn for her journals, to have a sneak peak into her bare, aching and pulsating soul on fire.

I'm not either, but thanks

Something like hip hop electronica, but slowed down and dreamy, sometimes darker, melancholic and eerie. Like Massive Attack, Tricky, Portishead and some Bjork stuff. Rhythm reminds me of heart skipping beats.

Here is my movie compilation (Possession from 1981 is maybe my fav for personal reasons): http://lanaboards.com/index.php?/topic/5874-the-horror-movie-thread/page-3 ***** A song (one of many; if you listen to it more than once, it actually becomes comical): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eVWEqQnjT0M&list=LL9CCVWwgkZBOBhbVosxq6rg&index=16 This cutie: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yg6PtoYD7rA&index=51&list=LL9CCVWwgkZBOBhbVosxq6rg Gore parts : https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y2Gf0MmRz9g Not SO explicit bdsm horror porno by Richard Kern: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TSY5fTa9v7c Also his, fucked up family story with misfit: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oY9LzzrUmD4

I tend to be attracted more by psychological thriller/suspense movies without extreme, gorey propulsions of blood, mangling or slaughter, where the accent is more about tingling the mind, although I can find pleasure in both. Rosemary's Baby by Roman Polanski Repulsion (also Polanski): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MWwAO2RQruQ The Tenant (Polanski): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZmhIMbdecEU Possession (by Andrzej Zulawski) - fantastically disturbing scene in the subway halls: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EsDb4I6gAZQ (The movies about psychos, lunatics, moonstrucks and deranged personas, mental breakdowns or dismaying emotional states / deterioration / plunging down the rabbit hole of the main characters are just divine). Yes! Dario Argento movies, like Suspiria (psychological tension, spurts of blood, torture and juicy, intense, almost neon-like colors): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MecSlkWMHPY Phenomena (also his): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4Mk6EjlATp4 Other Argento movies: La Sindrome Di Stendhal Trauma Demons Inferno Tenebre Profondo Rosso etc. Nosferatu the Vampire (both by Friedrich Murnau from 1922. and Werner Herzog from 1979.): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S1Rachk7ipI (those are not cheesy teen faint vampire movies like today ones, but real treasure with professional acting, convincing plot, firm, complex, mature character motivation and memorable, haunting atmosphere) Psycho Clockwork Orange (in a way) Carrie The Exorcist (1973) The Hunger (1983) American Psycho The Shining Irreversible (by Gaspar Noe) Antichrist (by Lars Von Trier) Santa Sangre (by Alejandro Jodorowsky) - more a hallucinant, psychedelic, surreal trip than pure horror: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fDgwu4scwQM Glissements Progressifs Du Plaisir (by Alain Robbe-Grillet) : https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GMFsW_FTmy0 (From what I saw, his other movies are also worth all the summer and winter time. He explores perversities and deals with psychological vivisection of protagonists.) I am in the process of researching European arthouse bizzare porno horror (s)exploitation movies from the seventies, thanks to COLACUNT videos and some exhibitions I have recently seen PS. Many of these are not typical horrors, I love hybrid genres.

Into The Night - Julee Cruise

Sour Times - Portishead

Finito. This mechanism is really fucked up, all your instructions work ( ), but after the entire hour of maniacal pressing buttons like retarded monkey. Anyway, ... ..

Hey, I managed to replace my old profile photo with new in the time when this issue was hot, even without the help of this thread (I was lucky), but now that thing does not work. I followed every single step from everyone here today, but it just won't listen to me. Is my profile blocked or what? The "DONE" button does not even work anymore. The witch obviously is not dead yet.

I agree, but what does it have to do with the thread? ......... Nevermind, you weren't talking to me anyway.

I am so glad that you feel better about yourself now.

I think about this now and it also makes sense. Despite of my own discoveries on that issue, I dramatized a little bit and had this logoreic outbursts because of this itchy state of anticipation. I also used to speculate about her possible BPD, but I realized it is ridiculous, since all I know about her is her public persona and content of her lyrics. Nevertheless, I understood she behaved edgy in the past, so that is where I drew my conclusions from. But, I'll never know and there lies the magic.

So, I see Lana as a grown up Lizzy, with much more informations and experience, therefore, with more complex and multilayered personality, which could be expanded in many branches, and there would always be subtle nuances that cause overlappings of Lana's subpersonas. She had a tough life, so maybe she first created ideal self, magnificent and enchanting, reinventing her being, and then descended into deepness and darkness, deconstructing that mysterious ideal by confessing total opposites (her pains and sorrows) and then again raised above from the ashes, like a snake that bites its own tail, all of that in parallel circles (I don't know if that makes any sense). (I shouldn't write so much, I have a business to do)

I think there are four main courses Lana's persona went: Lolita, which is fluffy, innocent, flirty, flighty capricious and naive, and mischievous, that likes to tease older men („get us while we're hot“) or to take sweet advantage of them (while, simultaneously, she is being in a kind of trap and dominated reversely), like in „Off To The Races“, or provoking them with her barely blossoming sexuality („you know you like little girls“), or falls madly in love and seduces the figure of authority, like an officer in „Playing Dangerous“, or invoking nymphet Brigitte Bardot in „Moi je joue“ (she just plays, careless and free), or even sleeping with teachers, or just being a mess in her summer dress (ecstasy of sun kissed youth, not aware of sadnesses of life) in „Lolita“. All of that singing in a flamboyant girly voice. (Ok, part of them are still Lizzy, but they announce Lana) Vamp/femme fatale archetype that has deadly, poisonous influence on men, but at the end she is the one left with some sour, agonizing cognition about life and relationships, hurt, bitter, tired and heartbroken („Million Dollar Man“, „Born To Die“, „Tired Of Singing The Blues“, „The Man I love“, „Pin Up Galore“). Actually, she is sultry vampish devourer of men, like a Medusa, but in the conclusion of the story she is the one that bears tragedy on her shoulders and drags it like the moon drags its ragged chrysalis in the darkest night of the soul (paraphrasing one of the poems by Sylvia Plath). Vulnerable girl next door (not yet a woman), submissive, masochistic, depressed, and totally, unconditionally devoted to her master, crawling for the crumbles and living in devastating denial that beating the hell out of her or sharing her with his alpha female is a dream life, and tough love is true love. She hates or loathes herself here, and being thrown in the pit by some disgusting, arrogant brute, she becomes the total opposite of glamorous Lana. She even self-hypnotizes herself in desperate attempt to extinguish the wounds and to keep going in that golden cage of hers. At the end, wild, untamed, multifaceted, chaotic soul tortured by her hyperactve, diamond, flashing mind, but deciding to just do what she wants and to abandon herself in the fiery grasp of her chameleonic, wanderlust, adventurous and ballsy personality. I would call it an Amazon or Lilith, the most affirmative aspect of her persona, that breaks free from all cuffs and coffins of other people's expectations and just jumps into fire, because life is courage, daring and being the captain of her own destiny. She is the most substantive here, the winner. (And that persona even has a touch of male aspect in it, therefore, she becomes psychologically androginous, while staying sensual and seductive.) „Ride“ would be the best example IMO, but „Fucked My Way Up To The Top“ also has hints of that persona, maybe „Money, Power, Glory“, although here she still partially is a slave to her desires and hungers, but satyrical tone of the song annihilates it. And I forgot glam Lana, without love aches of vamp and sub part, who just sings about all her wins and losses, summed in one gorgeous cocktail (most songs from "Paradise"). Actually, i see a lot more ("Disco" and "Get Drunk", deeply personal and so Lizzy), but that is for another gigantic text sausage.

Yeah. They could function if she was younger, to give her that cute, popsicle Lolita look, but she definitely radiates most powerfully as a sultry vamp with Veronica Lake locks flipped on one side. Tousled, windy, rock look of UV is also delicious, but I cultivate nostalgia for that long, lush, seductive waves reminiscent of Hollywood glamour, even when combined with ferrari jackets and massive golden hip hop chains. And bangs cover her monumental forehead, which adds to the beauty of her long, melancholic, sensual oval face - now it is somehow deformed, and all accent goes to the nose, lips, cheeks and chin, at least two of them been reconstructed and plastic.

Two more collages:

Inspired by "The Fearless Vampire Killers" by Roman Polanski: Inspired by "Possession" by Andrzej Zulawski (with magnificent Isabelle Adjani in leading female role): Marguerite Duras (writer) as a child in Indochine: Audrey Horne: Nico: Something: [content removed] Etc. I have hundreds and hundreds of drawings and photos, and many collages and paintings, maybe once I will put a link to one of my sites

My art is dark and macabric, but I am pure joy I just spit my demons out, and then all that is left is a reincarnated butterfly. I know you won't like it, I kinda used to a taste of Lanaboards members. [content removed]

I have read many times that female victims of sexual abuse tend to go into extremes: either panically running away from sex and intimacy, or becoming nymphomaniacs. Allegedly, the second is not that rare at all. And we all know that Lana likes to brag about her stunts. Ok, now I feel dirty mouthed. But I think she just like to exaggerate everything in her manner of histrionic drama queen, as you said, because she knows that hot, spicy details, mysteries, teases, contradictions and controversies add to the grandiose image of a living legend.

There is certified theory in psychology that all addictions (so, also Lanas alcoholism, I suppose) stem from toxic relationships with parents, especially mother, who wasn't there in the earliest, more fragile and tender years of child's psychological developement, so that needy and helpless tiny child was not given enough love and care, wasn't nurtured and that kind of malnutritioning care, together with cold, controlling, possessive, but emotionally distant, unavailable and disapproving mother, creates enormous hole in child's being. That hole and perpetuating feeling of emptiness is later in life (unsuccessfully) filled with opiates and different substances that alter counsciousness and provide short-term escape from dark, painful reality (sucking elusive tit = sucking a bottle).That reality is conviction that you are not worthy of love (and you also desperately crave and yearn for that love, and alcohol warms your veins for a couple of hours, giving you false feeling of inner warmth - the real one can be provided only by love, of course). Also, addiction belongs to oral fixation, which is a part of oral character, formed in the first, earliest psychosexual stage of development. Others are: anal, phallic, latency and genital. Those who succesfully cross all traps of each phase and reach genital one, are the most developed and integrated, and oral types are the ones that have most wounds and complexes. I'm not saying Lana is a walking pathology, but I just find it interesting (yes, I'm nosy, but also interested in psychoanalysis) that she first tanked herself with liquor, and now is passionately engaged in chain smoking. That is typical for oral constitution (I am exactly the same. I fought with alcoholism for about seven years, and I'm clean for about six, and I still miss my wild and escapistic life). As far as her mother is concerned, maybe she wasn't a witch, but if a father responds to daughter's attempts of seduction, she takes that as a signal that she possibly can replace mother and marry her beloved papa (Electra Complex, as someone said here). If daddy is especially fond of his little princess, she will develop strong attachment to him and view mother as a nasty rival. I think it is a normal phase in life, but it can lead to various tragedies if it is not overcome. But, maybe I am all wrong about alcoholism and mother issues in her case.

Gosh, I really can speak and speak

Not at all! I haven't already respond to this excellent post because I stayed appaled by the volume and richness of vocabulary you manage with. My english is not so profuse and prolific, but yes, I also noticed I have an irresistable urge to repeat encounter with pieces that left me breathless, elevated and inspired at the same time. First time I'm reading some literary dainty, I usually catch and breathe in the atmosphere, the melody of the language, ringlets of tropes and stylistic murmurs and ripples, abandoning myself on high waves of that sparkling superficial coating, just casually brushing off the main protagonists, and then later I dare to get sucked into psychological vivisection and dense, exuberant layers of liaisons dangereuses. In the beginning I was in a sort of disbelief: is this the same person who stood behind Humbert Humbert's sleaze and the whole speedy and seedy emotional claustrophobia of that doomed and perverted relationship? Because Ada had, in my head, a sort of impressionistic spark and all was in some milky, balsamic, resin patina, honeygold transfusion of verbal molasses and vertiginous meanders that arrested time in one soft, cotton nimbus and everything was like captured in a capsule of paralel universum, while Lolita, although a story about taboo and darkest deviations, seemed to me so hyperreal, so exploding in the face and kicking in the guts. And yes, I started to notice I am getting exhausted by expressing myself in my own language, and I am challenged to write poems in english, because it is so fluid and melodious, and that situation has a similarity with the fact that I much more easily open myself to a total stranger in the train than to my closest dears. You made me think. PS. It is easy, but also not at all wrong or punishable, to be absorbed in that simulacrum whirlpool because I believe the sole choice of words reflects the nature of our ponderings and courses of our meditations. I sometimes fear that I sound pretentious, but I don't care, I simply enjoy playing with words and rolling them in my tongue. At least poetry (even the attempts of it) is that consecrated playground that welcomes all sorts of faquir acrobatics, a space of infinite freedom. And yes, what is that book "about the role of vodka and women in lifes of Polish artists during interwar period" called? I would like to read it, if there is an english translation.