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American Whore

Apple Spring Event: March 8, 2022 "Peek Performance"

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It's that tiiiiime again ladies and gays and everyone else. Apple event time. :clapback:

 

Screen-Shot-2022-03-02-at-11.05.02-AM.jp

 

 

so what are we gonna predict we'll see?

 

 


giphy.gif

if i fuck this model and she just bleached her asshole and i get bleach on my t-shirt, imma feel like an asshole

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4 minutes ago, the ocean said:

i'm so out of touch with apple stuff tbh

 

i had an iphone 6s for literal years and was completely content with it and only recently got an iphone 11 cause it was gifted

 

i have all tingzzz apple tbh :sass: i'm on my macbook, i have my ipad pro, my iphone. i'm content with what i have but i really want a macbook pro 16in for the screen size for writing bc i wanna start writing books at some point. i don't expect to see an updated macbook pro 16 in though i think that'll be in the fall :squidward:

 

i love apple events. like i buy their stuff bc i can trust them with privacy and stuff yknow what i mean? i don't have much to hide (just illegally downloaded music tbh) but like i don't want the government spying on meeeeeee so i get apple stuff for that fact :true:


giphy.gif

if i fuck this model and she just bleached her asshole and i get bleach on my t-shirt, imma feel like an asshole

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Now you can get micro speakers implanted in your ear canals and listen to music wirelessly wherever you want! Apple contacts with special high definition camera lens allows you to take pictures with your eyes and send them to your phone, or your bestie’s eyes so they can see what you see. Improved front facing camera with new hologram projection so you can chat directly with the FBI agent who’s been monitoring you :oprah4:


UbsOye5.png

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2 minutes ago, Sugar Venom said:

Now you can get micro speakers implanted in your ear canals and listen to music wirelessly wherever you want! Apple contacts with special high definition camera lens allows you to take pictures with your eyes and send them to your phone, or your bestie’s eyes so they can see what you see. Improved front facing camera with new hologram projection so you can chat directly with the FBI agent who’s been monitoring you :oprah4:

 

gorl my fbi agent hates me tumblr_mho0ws0KDG1qd8zg3o1_500.gif


giphy.gif

if i fuck this model and she just bleached her asshole and i get bleach on my t-shirt, imma feel like an asshole

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19 minutes ago, Hydroponic Weeds said:

 

i have all tingzzz apple tbh :sass: i'm on my macbook, i have my ipad pro, my iphone. i'm content with what i have but i really want a macbook pro 16in for the screen size for writing bc i wanna start writing books at some point. i don't expect to see an updated macbook pro 16 in though i think that'll be in the fall :squidward:

 

i love apple events. like i buy their stuff bc i can trust them with privacy and stuff yknow what i mean? i don't have much to hide (just illegally downloaded music tbh) but like i don't want the government spying on meeeeeee so i get apple stuff for that fact :true:

 

i have a lot of apple things but i don't really stay up to date with it i just get it and then keep it for like 5 years


 5oDY3ok.gif ZLI8w1N.png 5oDY3ok.gif

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Mac "Studio" (purportedly a desktop Mac between the Mini and the Pro), and a 27" Studio display priced cheaper than the Pro Display XDR (might be an instant buy, depending on how much cheaper. If priced 2000 or below, yes.). 

 

iPhone SE 3 (same design + new chips and 5G) 

 

iPad Air 

 

new iPhone 13 color (possibly Green). 


⊹ (:̲̅:̲̅:̲̅[̲̅:♡:]̲̅:̲̅:̲̅:̲̅) ⊹ 

𓊔 I took the miracle move on drug 𓊔

⚕️ The effects were temporary ⚕️

⊹ (:̲̅:̲̅:̲̅[̲̅:♡:]̲̅:̲̅:̲̅:̲̅) ⊹ 

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full disclosure i work for a company that is apple adjacent but these are just based of rumors i've seen online. i do not have any inside information and am curious to see if those who claim to will be correct. 

 

32 minutes ago, Hydroponic Weeds said:

i really want a macbook pro 16in for the screen size for writing bc i wanna start writing books at some point. i don't expect to see an updated macbook pro 16 in though i think that'll be in the fall 

 

they just updated their MBPs in Oct. of 2021. Expect the same design for the next 4-5 years with spec bumps in yearly to 18 month increments. 


⊹ (:̲̅:̲̅:̲̅[̲̅:♡:]̲̅:̲̅:̲̅:̲̅) ⊹ 

𓊔 I took the miracle move on drug 𓊔

⚕️ The effects were temporary ⚕️

⊹ (:̲̅:̲̅:̲̅[̲̅:♡:]̲̅:̲̅:̲̅:̲̅) ⊹ 

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31 minutes ago, Mer said:

Mac "Studio" (purportedly a desktop Mac between the Mini and the Pro), and a 27" Studio display priced cheaper than the Pro Display XDR (might be an instant buy, depending on how much cheaper. If priced 2000 or below, yes.). 

 

iPhone SE 3 (same design + new chips and 5G) 

 

iPad Air 

 

new iPhone 13 color (possibly Green). 

 

I heard about these!! But I have a feeling they’ll do a refresh for the iPad Pros? Since they did one in spring 2020 and spring 2021, i think it makes the most sense but nobody’s really leaking info on it so we’ll see. That’s my big hope for this, because I need to upgrade my iPad Pro at this point, it’s starting to show its age


giphy.gif

if i fuck this model and she just bleached her asshole and i get bleach on my t-shirt, imma feel like an asshole

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I will be watching

cant wait to see how thinner the bezel is for the new ipad. Nothing says we are evolutionizing as a species like the thinness of a bezel [since apple doesn't innovate anymore] :wowcry:

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She's hot. 

GET TO THE DISPLAY PRICE WOMAN I NEED TO KNOW IF I CAN AFFORD THIS OR NOT 


⊹ (:̲̅:̲̅:̲̅[̲̅:♡:]̲̅:̲̅:̲̅:̲̅) ⊹ 

𓊔 I took the miracle move on drug 𓊔

⚕️ The effects were temporary ⚕️

⊹ (:̲̅:̲̅:̲̅[̲̅:♡:]̲̅:̲̅:̲̅:̲̅) ⊹ 

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