bia

Come on I know you like
 
 
Little giiiirls
 

I can’t believe they were herded into a room and forced to listen on tinny speakers  And that people were able to miss entire tracks yet still review the whole body of work? I don’t have any knowledge of this kind of thing, so maybe that’s standard, but even if it is wtf??
 
The Gigwise reviewer gets it, and is so real for laying out how it all happened. And she’s def a Lana stan lol. Lucy, are you on LB? 

Actually for sales it’s a good strategy. The GP doesn’t necessarily care for the scores of reviews themselves. The article with the review will pop on your mother’s facebook feed and she’ll be like oh I actually didn’t know that there’s a tunnel under ocean blv, lemme check it out. It’s just another form of promo and getting the news out there. 

As a member of ~the media~ who receives IP locked releases from labels for review (this wasn't one of them), I've never received one from an Interscope artist where a track was missing so it's unlikely.

You all need to realize, critics are not fans of the music they listen to. They listen to so many new releases that they would probably not even play the same thing twice. An 80/100 or 8/10 is a high enough review that that's not bad. that's 4/5 stars. Considering some of the lyrics on this album, specifically at the end and i don't want to put this in spoilers because I'm not spoiling anything, I'm surprised they didn't feel any type of way. Maybe they didn't pay attention to the lyrics, who knows. But they aren't Lana fans. They've probably heard her music before, they know it's good but they don't find it to be life changing. A lot of us have a grandiose expectation from her and sometimes we feel we get what we want so it's automatically "brilliant" and the music IS good imo, but I couldn't see this being a 10/10, 100/100 album. It's good, but at the same time it's long in places that shouldn't be and short in places it shouldn't be. The interludes are about 2 minutes too long, the last three tracks of the album are about 3 minutes too short each track, and the album is still good. 
 
The critics never love Lana, it's something we'll always have to deal with. Lana needs to accept it herself. Realize the music is there for those who care to listen and who care to give it a try, but it's also not going to hit with everyone. Sometimes her music is only for some people who get it. 

My matches are ready for the basement that they run that shit magazine from

up at 2:55am reading reviews 
 

FOUR DAYS LEFT!!! I CAN'T BELIEVE THE ALBUM'S COMING THIS VERY WEEK 

What upsets me is the idea of putting a bunch of critics in a room together for 80 minutes to listen to the album. This album should be listened to alone, a couple times at least, with full focus. People leaving the room and missing full songs to write a review after one listen is a total joke. 

And we will prove that bullying works 

apparently nfr opened with a 76 on metacritic. we'll be just fine

That's very disrespectful, they are supposed to be there to pay careful attention to the album. when i catch those mfs...

The Gig’s reviewer, Lucy Harbron is such a stan lmao you can see it in the way she writes. We like you Lucy we like you!! 

"It’s a 10 - not because it’s faultless, not because everyone in the world will love it, not because it’s a skipless listen - but because it’s nothing below." -Lucy Harbron, Gigwise
 
Amazing way to put it. There are a few tracks I dislike, but this album is an artistic triumph

Honestly that is iconic behaviour and we stan 

So that’s why some reviews don’t mention Candy Necklace. They did a toilet break at Judah Smith Interlude 

I just listened to the album for the first time front to back just now, and I've been holding my pee in the whole time 

They were only allowed to listen to it once and some people went to the toilet and missed tracks? What??

Gigwise calling out other critics for leaving the room and missing whole tracks during the listening and saying that Lana should hate critics more 

"People go to the toilet missing entire tracks, twiddle thumbs, scribble notes. We listen once, and leave to give it a rating and comment on its merit."
 
and i wonder why they're not giving it 5/5s...

I’m so glad gigwise mentions that actually. Only a few paragraphs in but their review seems sm more self aware than the others re: criticism 

How can you write a proper review after ONE listen? 

From the Far Out review “I’m waiting to be taken to the listening room. Universal Music don’t want Lana Del Rey’s latest album, Did you know that there’s a tunnel under Ocean Blvd, to leak, so all the music writers in London have been summoned to UMG headquarters to listen, take notes and nibble free peanuts.” So yeah I’m guessing they all listened to it once.