LA Who Am I To Love You

[Dominikx4 25,418]

Audiobook version:

I left my city for San Francisco
Took a freeride off a billionaire's jet
 
LA, I'm from nowhere, who am I to love you?
LA, I've got nothing, who am I to love you when I'm feeling this way, and I've got nothing to offer?
LA, not quite the city that never sleeps
Not quite the city that wakes
But the city that dreams, for sure
 
If by dreams you mean in nightmares
LA, im a dreamer but I'm from nowhere, who am I to dream?
LA, I'm upset, I have complaints, listen to me
They say I came from money and I didn't
And I didn't even have love, and it's unfair
 
LA, I sold my life's rights for a big check, and I'm upset
And now I can't sleep at night, and I don't know why
Plus, I love Saks, so why did I do that when I know it won't last?
 
LA, I picked San Francisco because the man who doesn't love me lives there
LA, I am pathetic, but so are you, can I come home now?
Daughter to noone, table for one, party of thousands, of people I don't know, at Delilah where my ex-husband works
 
I sick of this, but can I come home now?
Mother to noone, private jet for one, back home to the Tudor house that borne a thousand murder plots
Hancock park, it's treated me very badly

I'm resentful
 
The witch on the corner, the neighbour nobody wanted
The reason for Garcetti's extra security
 
LA I know I am bad, but I have nowhere else to go, can I come home now?
 
I never had a mother, will you let me make the sun my own for now
And the ocean my son
I'm quite good at tending to things despite my upbringing, can I raise your mountains?
I promise to keep them greener, make them my daughters, teach them about fire, warn them about water
 
I'm lonely, LA, can I come home now?
I left my city for San Francisco
And I'm writing from the Golden Gate Bridge
But it's not going as I planned
I took a freeride off a billionaire and brought my typewriter and promised myself that I would stay but
It's just not going the way that I thought
 
It's not that I feel different, and I don't mind that it's not hot
It's just that I belong to noone which means
There's only one place for me
 
The city not quite awake, the city not quite asleep
The city that's still deciding how good it can be
 
And also I can't sleep without you
Noones ever really held me like you
Not quite tightly, but certainly I feel your body next to me
Smoking next to me
Vaping lightly next to me
 
And I love that you love the neon lights like me
Orange in the distance
We both love that
And I love that we have that in common
 
Also, neither one of us can go back to New York
For you are unmoving
As for me, it won't be my city again until I'm dead
Fuck the New York Post
 
LA, who am I to need you when I have needed so much, asked for so much, and what I have been given, I'm not sure yet
I may never know that either until I'm dead
For now though, what I do know

 

Is although I don't deserve you
Not you at your best and your splendor
With towering eucalyptus trees that sway in my dominion
 
Not you at your worst
Totally on fire, unlivable, unbreathable, I need you
You see, I have no mother
And you do
A continental shelf
A larger piece of land from where you came
And I?
I'm an orphan
 
A little seashell that rests upon your native shores
One of many, for sure
But because of that, I surely must love you closely to the most of anyone
For that reason, let me love you
Don't mind my desperation
Let me hold you, not just for vacation
But for real and for forever
Make it real life
Let me be a real wife to you
Girlfriend, lover, mother, friend
I adore you
 
Dont be put off by my quick-wordedness
I'm generally quite quiet
Quite a meditator, actually
I'll do very well down by Paramhansa Yogananda's realization center, I'm sure
 
I promise you'll barely even notice me
Unless you want to notice me
Unless you prefer a rambunctious child
In which case, I can turn it on, too
 
I'm quite good on the stage as you may know
You might have heard of me
 
So either way, I'll fit in just fine
So just love me by doing nothing
 
And perhaps by not shaking the county line
I'm yours if you'll have me, but regardless
You're mine

Book version:

Spoiler

 

LA, I’m from nowhere who am I to love you

LA, I’ve got nothing who am I to love you

when I’m feeling this way

and I’ve got nothing to offer

LA

not quite the city that never sleeps

not quite the city that wakes

But the city that dreams for sure

if by dreams you mean nightmares.

LA

I’m a dreamer but

I’m from nowhere who am I to dream

LA

I’m upset!

I have complaints!

Listen to me

They say I come from money and I didn’t and I didn’t even have

love and it’s unfair

LA

I sold my life rights for a big check

but now I can’t sleep at night and I don’t know why

plus I love Saks so why did I do that when I know

it won’t last

LA

I picked San Francisco because the man who doesn’t love me

lives there

LA!

I’m pathetic

but so are you

can I come home now?

Daughter to no one

table for one

party of thousands of people I don’t know at Delilah

where my ex-husband works

I’m so sick of this

But

Can I come home now?

Mother to no one

private jet for one

back home to the Tudor house that borne a thousand murder

plots

Hancock Park treated me very badly I’m resentful.

The witch on the corner

the neighbor nobody wanted

the reason for Garcetti’s extra security.

LA!

I know I’m bad but I have nowhere else to go can I come

home now?

I never had a mother

will you let me make the sun my own now

and the ocean my son

I’m quite good at tending to things despite my upbringing

Can I raise your mountains?

I promise to keep them greener make them my daughters

teach them about fires warn them about water

I’m lonely LA

can I come home now?

I left my city for San Francisco

I’m writing from the golden gate bridge but it’s not going

as planned

I took a free ride off a billionaire and brought my

typewriter and promised myself I would stay

but

it’s just not going the way I thought

it’s not that I feel different

and I don’t mind that it’s not hot

it’s just that I belong to no one, which means

there’s only one place for me

the city not quite awake

the city not quite asleep

the city that’s something else- something in between

the city that’s still deciding

how good it should be

and also

I can’t sleep without you

No one’s ever really held me like you

not quite tightly

but certainly I feel your body next to me

smoking next to me

vaping lightly next to me

and I love that you love the neon lights

like me

Orange

in the distance. We both love that and I love that we have

that in common.

Also neither one of us can go back to New York.

For you, are unmoving.

As for me, it won’t be my city again until I’m dead.

Fuck the New York Post!

LAAAAA!

Who am I to need you when I’ve needed so much

asked for so much

what i’ve been given I’m not yet sure I may never know that either

until I’m dead.

 

I know I’m bad but I have nowhere else to go can I come

home now?

I never had a mother

will you let me make the sun my own now

and the ocean my son

I’m quite good at tending to things despite my upbringing

Can I raise your mountains?

I promise to keep them greener make them my daughters

teach them about fires warn them about water

I’m lonely LA

can I come home now?

I left my city for San Francisco

I’m writing from the golden gate bridge but it’s not going

as planned

I took a free ride off a billionaire and brought my

typewriter and promised myself I would stay

but

it’s just not going the way I thought

it’s not that I feel different

and I don’t mind that it’s not hot

it’s just that I belong to no one, which means

there’s only one place for me

the city not quite awake

the city not quite asleep

the city that’s something else- something in between

the city that’s still deciding

how good it should be

and also

I can’t sleep without you

No one’s ever really held me like you

not quite tightly

but certainly I feel your body next to me

smoking next to me

vaping lightly next to me

and I love that you love the neon lights

like me

Orange

in the distance. We both love that and I love that we have

that in common.

Also neither one of us can go back to New York.

For you, are unmoving.

As for me, it won’t be my city again until I’m dead.

Fuck the New York Post!

 

LAAAAA!

Who am I to need you when I’ve needed so much

asked for so much

what i’ve been given I’m not yet sure I may never know that either

until I’m dead.

 

For now though

what I do know is that I don’t deserve you-

not you at your best, in your splendor with towering

eucalyptus trees that sway in my dominion

Not you at your worst-

totally on fire, unlivable unbreathable.

I don’t deserve you at all

You see- You have a mother

A continental shelf

a larger piece of land from you came

 

And I am an orphan

a little seashell that rests upon your native shores

one of many that’s for sure but because of that

I surely must love you closely to the most out of anyone.

 

For that reason-

Let me love you

don’t mind my desperation

let me hold you not just for vacation but for real and forever

Make it real life, let me be a real wife to you.

Girlfriend, lover, mother, friend.

I adore you

Don’t be put off by my quick-wordedness

I’m generally quite quiet, quite a meditator

actually I’ll do very well down by Paramahansa Yogananda’s

Realization center I’m sure.

I promise you’ll barely even notice me

unless you want to notice me

unless you prefer a rambunctious child

in which case I can turn it on too!

I’m good on the stage as you may know, you may have heard of me?

So either way I’ll fit in just fine

so just love me by doing nothing

except for perhaps by not shaking the county line.

I’m yours if you’ll have me

quietly or loudly

sincerely your daughter

regardless

you’re mine.

 

 

[Rust Dress 40,286]

Thank you!

[Dominikx4 25,418]

please move to the VBBOTG section @@admin cant open new topics there

[Amadeus 11,334]

 

Unless you prefer a ?? child

 

Unless you prefer a rambunctious child, maybe?

[Beautiful Loser 49,647]

Omg what is this, I-

 

I did not expect this. "I'm an orphan" If she really means it, she must have felt really alone and unimportant to her family or her parents sometime, or maybe it's just her mom. I can hear the sadness, confusion and frustration when I'm reading this. And even thought I can never understand what she's feeling, she somehow makes it very easy to understand what she's trying to say.

I really like this poem!

[May 13,313]

some of these would be really good lines in a song.

 

i especially love her saying fuck the NY post, i hope she's this outspoken and direct on cocc, reminds me of her sharp ultraviolence lyric style

[fl0ridakil0s 3,960]

This is beautiful. Wow, I'm speechless

[Terrence Loves Me 72,892]

Can’t wait to hear it, I love this

[drugsdesire 10,000]

that shit hurted

[Rorman Nockwell 56,955]

I don't think it's "Zac", it sounds like "sax"/"sacks" to me? Idk 

Also Garcetti is the mayor of LA, what's THAT about ... 

[Lanalouis1 2,511]

"I never had a mother" 

[Amadeus 11,334]

I never had a mother, will you let me make the sun my own for now

And the ocean, my sun

Im quite good at tending to things despite my upbringing, can I raise your mountains?

I promise to keep them greener, make them my daughters, teach them about fire, warn them about water

 

Idk this might be a reach and we'll see once the book comes out in september but could it be that she's saying "and the ocean, my son" it would fit with in with the context of making the mountains her daughters, but could also be a reach obviously idk.

[Dominikx4 25,418]

Idk this might be a reach and we'll see once the book comes out in september but could it be that she's saying "and the ocean, my son" it would fit with in with the context of making the mountains her daughters, but could also be a reach obviously idk.

yuh makes sense!

i think i got it now, will update if it differs from the version we get in the book

[Rorman Nockwell 56,955]

"Sachs" = Goldman Sachs? Play on words? It's about money/relationships ... 

[Nobody 21,606]

If she's saying Zach is might be Zach Dawes? 

[Venice 6,933]

I love how she says LA out of breath the third time, the emotion   

[PARADIXO 33,090]

Oh my fucking god Amazing. This feels so much like a poetic letter, instead of a poem (which is obviously the intention, I think).

 

The only part I didn't like was

 

"And I love that you love the neon lights like me

Orange in the distance
We both love that
And I love that we have that in common"

 

Very redundant, plus I don't think it adds anything.

 

But the rest is on fire.

 

@@Dominikx4 Can't merge this to the Violet lyrics thread, only Elle can. So we gotta wait for her!

[Rorman Nockwell 56,955]

If she's saying Zach is might be Zach Dawes? 

 

I hear an S sound at the end but ... possible I guess

 

ETA: could be Zach, but really slurred

[Divisive Princess 3,755]

Wow there is so much to unpack here

[MargaretThatcher 1,332]

That was deep! I felt that!!