Member of the Week #11: Monicker

[Sitar 22,210]

The moment we've all been waiting for...Monicker finally agreed to an interview, despite perhaps not being the type (see his abuse of the sound-bite rule after the spoiler )! Your favorite masked music dude, of the pretty voice and innumerable list of confessed fetishes. A Lana forum of any ilk wouldn't be quite the same without him, so do enjoy his very characteristic responses and show some love. I enjoyed reading this one a lot and I'll be waiting for him in the D-A-R-K, of course

 

 

Member of the Week: Monicker!

 

 

 

 

What did you do today?

Let me start off by saying that you (SitarHero) are absolutely correct in thinking that i’m not the interview type. The idea alone makes me uneasy. The aggregate of my posts, i can tell you right now, is far more personally revealing than what will come of this interview. That is the best way to get to know me, through my ramblings on various topics on here. So, if you truly desire to know what’s behind the S&M mask, just go back to my posts and catch all the ways in which i have veered wildly off topic. There are only a few of these questions that i feel i can/want to answer. Why did i agree to do this then? Maybe it’s because i’m sick in bed with a wretched flu that, two days ago, had me thinking i was dying, and continues to agonize me. I am somewhat out of it at the moment. What did i do today? I blew my nose a lot, coughed, sneezed, drank a lot of water, ate a lot of garlic, thought about music ideas, listened to music, dawdled on the internet, had a phone conversation, had quick sex, made food, made contact with a spirit world, washed the dishes.

 

(SH: hadquicksexhadquicksexhadquicksexhadquicksex wat else?)

 

What's something not many people know about you or that we would be surprised to learn about?

I generally dislike sass. I think internet forums are insane. 

 

(SH: #oop )

 

What's your current career? What's your dream job?

I do odd things here and there. I’m hoping i never have a career. I’ll tell you what my dream job isn’t: music. I have no desire to mix my passion with business. It makes no sense to me. It’s not a dream, it’s a bad idea. Schedules, deadlines, compromises, answering to others, etc. Your livelihood dependent on your art? Your art responsible for ensuring your paycheck? That’s insanity. Music is too sacred to me to try to capitalize on it. The 20th century American composer Charles Ives once said, referring to why he chose to work in insurance rather than make a living as a composer, “If a composer has a nice wife and some nice children, how can he let the children starve on his dissonances?” Granted, i will never have kids, but you get the point. 

 

What did you want to be when you were growing up? Have you become that yet? Did that decision change for you?

I never really wanted to be anything when i was growing up. I was confused and scared about that idea of being something when you grow up. I was just scared in general, of things, of life, of everything. I guess that has never really changed.   

 

What would you consider your greatest accomplishment(s)?

Making it this far, being alive still, being me, being mostly functional. Everyday this amazes me. It’s remarkable. Life is insane, it is constantly trying to kill us, people die every single second, most people don’t even make it past birth, the odds are against us even before conception, we are a speck of dust in the universe, and yet here we are, still alive in this chaos. That's really impressive. 

 

(SH: As you can see Monicker is giving thoughtful answers and rejecting sass and making mod interview interruptions very difficult.)

 

What are your hobbies?

Do i have hobbies? Masturbating? I mean, come on, look: An activity done regularly in one’s leisure time for pleasure. Although over the years, more and more it’s become kind of perfunctory and obligatory. Most of the time it’s probably more out of habit and for procrastination than anything else. I’m kind of over it at this point. Have i said too much?   So, i don’t know, taking walks? Looking out my  kitchen window? Yoga? Painting nails? Everything else that i do i am too invested in to be considered a hobby.  

 

(SH: That's better Okay so the main point of this is that you masturbate a lot and you're a #DirtyOldMan but yoga, really? Mo's already answered the questions and I'm talking to thin air but wow)

 

What's your biggest funny fail?

I was in kindergarten, five years old. We were waiting outside after school for our parents to pick us up. I had a friend named Cameron. For whatever reason, all the boys loved Cameron’s dad. I guess he was like a “fun” dad, you know? He looked like Clark Kent and he drove a convertible Corvette, it was silver and i think it had ugly maroon interior. The car must have had a lot to do with why five year old boys were so into this guy. Anyway, here’s the odd thing, every time Cameron’s dad came to pick him up from school, we would all run toward him screaming joyously, ending in a group hug. I’m...not sure why. It was just this after school kindergarten tradition for us. Run at Cameron’s dad when he pulls up in his cool Corvette. So it was a day like any other, and along pulls up Cameron’s dad in the silver Corvette. Naturally, we all proceed to run toward him. Have you ever watched Italian movies from the ’40s, little peasant kids with dirty faces running around with their mouths agape? That’s what it looked like. Anyway, i don’t know if this was something that i always did or if i was trying on something new that day, but i started running with my arms flailing around wildly, as if i had just been stung by a hundred bees. Now, Cameron’s dad was a tall fellow and we, remember, were five year olds, so we were little, quite short. On this particular day i was out in front, leading the pack of bee-stung five year old peasant Italian boys from the ’40s, charging at Clark Kent with my hands in fists for whatever reason. I was at the absolute perfect height to land a charging sucker punch right on his balls. Poor Cameron's dad. I had never seen anyone involuntarily contract their whole body like they were being sucked in by a vacuum cleaner at the groin. He instantaneously dropped to his knees while letting out what he could of an “OH!” We all just froze, confused and scared, staring at him. The fun was over, just like that. Cameron’s dad pulled me aside and educated me that day on the sensitivity of men’s testicles. 

 

(SH: This close to taking a tally of genital mentions.)

 

What is your favorite memory?

I have few concrete memories, they’re mostly just vague, abstract pictures accompanied by a feeling. I can’t even imagine what it would be like to have a favorite memory. What, would you think about it often? Would you wish to relive/re-experience it? Is it your favorite because you think about it more often? Am i avoiding the question?

 

Lana's junior and high school years have been rather chaotic from what we know. How were/are yours?

Not chaotic in the least. Sheltered, quiet, privileged, peaceful, kind of isolated, ignorant. High school was mostly a fruitful time for my personal endeavors. Really, my life was better before the internet. I was more productive than i am now, and i probably had less anxiety. But at school and socially speaking it was dreadful. From the first day of ever attending school to the very last day, for twelve solid years, it was constant ridicule, being picked on, made fun of, harassed, bullied, called names, laughed at, yelled at, endlessly. It was really taxing. But being a kid and being an adult both have their places, i believe. They’re both simultaneously great and terrible. They’re a part of a whole. I would never trade one for the other.   

 

(SH: + Perez Hilton.

I want to direct an artsy movie starring Monicker)

 

Do any of the words “sassy”, “fabulous”, or “flawless” describe you?

I sincerely hope not. 

 

If you could bring two people back from the dead, have an exquisite dinner, and some great conversation with them...who would they be and what would you eat?

Okay, so i’d tell whoever/whatever was bestowing me with this true metaphysical wonder to just pick a Neanderthal at random for my first choice. Then i’d choose JS Bach as the second person. The Neanderthal would spend the entire dinner in a state of utter confusion that would be beyond incomprehensible. I would attempt to show Bach a wide array of music from over the last 263 years that he has been dead. Let’s get something straight here--Bach would be just as, nay, probably even more, confused than the Neanderthal. I’ve always wondered what Bach would think of, like, Death metal or Serialism or an Aphex Twin album or 8-bit Nintendo music (which actually borrows a lot from Bach--but would he even understand the timbres?), but this would probably just be a wasted opportunity because he would most likely hear it all as noise, literally, like the way you and i hear a siren or radio static or a jackhammer. This would be a great dinner party though. I imagine a lot of confused yelling. We would eat, hmmm, i don’t know, maybe something Paleolithic because a) there are some great meals that can be thrown together using a Paleolithic diet, and b) the Neanderthal would like that, right? It would be the one familiar thing to him or her. But at the same time it would be strange because the food would just be sitting there, appearing without him or her having to do any work to get it. Isn’t that funny? Come on, that’s funny. But then what if i ruin this Neanderthal with easy food? What if when he/she gets sent back in time, the entire course of humanity is set off track because i gave this Neanderthal a taste for the first ever (in retrograde?) "fast food"? Everything as we know it today would probably wind up completely different in a parallel universe. No, actually, humans would just go extinct before modern Homo Sapiens because Neanderthals would have stopped trying to find food, thinking instead that it would just supernaturally come to them like it did at my dinner party.

 

Or, okay, maybe we’d just go out for Indian or Thai or Vietnamese food. Can you imagine walking into your favorite restaurant with Johann Sebastian Bach and a Neanderthal? This is assuming, of course, that they both cooperate in coming along and act in a somewhat civil manner, right? I mean, i don’t think we’d even make it to appetizers or past the first piece of music that i'd want to show Bach before the Neanderthal clubs me over the head and/or starts to eat me, and Bach loses his mind and jumps out of a window. What was the question again? Jesus and Einstein. No, Gandhi and Mother Teresa. No, no, wait, Marilyn Monroe and Elvis! 

 

Do you believe in any form of life after death?

Not really. To believe means to accept something as truth and to feel certain about it, right? I don’t know if i really believe anything as true. 

 

Make up a word that you would use daily and describe what it means.

I am not schizophrenic, i do not make neologisms. But i have a friend who does. 

 

If your balls were a celebrity couple, who would they be?

SitarHero and Hundred Dollar Bill? Hitler and Eva Braun? Phil and Ronnie Spector? Sartre and Beauvoir? Dr. Phil and Oprah? Peanut butter and Jelly? What is even the criteria for answering this question? And what if i was a castrato? How do girls answer this question, replace balls with breasts? 

 

(SH: They usually don't Really no, most mention of dick'n'balls in any MotW intereview, awesome)

 

When did you become a fan of Lana? What was it about her that attracted you to her?

During the second wave, around November 2011. A friend of mine, who from time to time keeps me informed on pop culture stuff, texted me saying to check her out, that she was his new guilty pleasure. I listened to, i think, VG, BJ, BTD, KK, and MM, and wrote back to him that i didn’t see how or why this was a guilty pleasure. I liked her instantaneously. I was very excited to find some really great, solid pop songs with a voice full of character and nuance, and i just wanted to hear more. It quickly became apparent to me that she was this entire universe onto herself, and that’s something i love in artists and that’s common to my favorite ones. She didn’t seem safe at all even though it was in the domain of incredibly catchy music. Here was someone straddling some weird line between commercialism and blatant singularity. I loved how there were so many conflicting things going on with her music, persona, and style. Some aspects of her lyrics made me a bit uncomfortable. I liked that. But, at its simplest, the songs were just immediately grabbing. Something just clicked, there was a spark, i knew i was going down a rabbit hole. This is not the sort of thing that comes around too often, and i could tell right away that this was the real deal.

 

Which Lana album is your favorite?

A to the K to the second A

 

Favorite Lana song? Why?

I guess if i had to pick one, Lolita. Though that's not necessarily set in stone. But what a perfectly constructed little pop song. It’s kind of anthemic in this counterintuitive, renegade sort of way without being in your face about it. The lyrics are really idiosyncratic and i think quintessentially her. The song as a whole just strikes me as a distillation of Lana Del Rey. It also seems to me to bridge the gap between, and make amends with, Lizzy Grant and Lana Del Rey. Any way you slice it, the melodies are really great and it has interesting ideas running throughout it. It’s infallible too, no matter what arrangement it’s given (and we’ve heard five arrangements of it to date) it just remains a great song. Depending on the version, or even within the same version, it can be a little foreboding, menacing, a bit dark, yet light, sprightly and fun. Also, when i first heard the Hey Lolita Hey version i thought, “Fuck, this is how i would want to produce a mainstream pop artist today.” But i don’t care that someone else did it. It really excited me.   

 

If given the opportunity to meet Lana for an hour, what would you do/say?

Probably just talk with her about the Beach Boys and manicures for an hour if she’s cool with that. Maybe ask her if she wants to record an expensive album together in an old mansion in the Hollywood hills. I don’t think she and i have much in common at all except for social anxiety. 

 

(SH: I'd bet if she could choose any pre-determined fan conversation to carry out, it would be this one.)

 

Of all the unreleased videos and songs we have knowledge of, what do you thirst for most?

I don’t know, i don’t really think about this sort of thing. Maybe the Cola a cappella demo? 

 

Are you the leaker?

I would make Ben and Chloe proud.  

 

What was the last book you read?

Some transactional analysis thing on Anxiety & Depression. I am now reading a book on essays by photographers about photographs not taken. 

 

Recommend us a song (can’t be top 40/popular) that we just have to listen to!

This is a tough one. How can you recommend just one song? This is stressing me out. All right, fine, i got one, sorry this is gonna be a downer. So, i listen to a lot of what many people would consider “scary” music, lots of intense 20th century composition that came about as responses and reactions to war and atrocities, as well as ’50s - ’70s film scores, stuff that makes modern horror movie music sound like easy listening. So, i don’t know if it’s because i am very accustomed to it, but music never scares me in that sort of typical way that people think of when they think “scary music.” There are two exceptions to this, though--two songs that get me every time, that give me the chills and kind of put me on edge, though both do it in two very different ways. I’ll pick the one that has the more profound impact on me. It’s called Shtetl (Ghetto Life) and it's by John Zorn. It’s the first song from his album Kristallnacht, which is, to use a silly term, a “concept album” about the night of broken glass. It’s frighteningly evocative and unsettling and it usually imposes this deep, sinking feeling in me. How this piece of music is able to capture such a palpable sadness and horror, and convey it so effectively through music, that at times is still so beautiful, is pretty remarkable:

 

 

All right, i can’t leave you guys like that with that one. Let me cheat and give you another one. This one’s really fun and insane, a real piece of gold. In my opinion it’s one of the best recordings in the history of pop music. The Tammys were an early ’60s girl group and in 1963/64 they released the absolutely bonkers song Egyptian Shumba. There was nothing like it before nor has there been anything like it since. The arrangement is bizarre and really inventive, the production is adventurous and uncompromising, the performance is totally wild and unhinged, almost reckless. The needles must have all been in the red, the equipment probably going up in smoke. This song makes the frenetic energy of early Rock & Roll records by the likes of Little Richard and Jerry Lee Lewis sound like funeral dirges. Egyptian Shumba tears your head off and throws it in a river...while you’re still dancing to it. There should be an entire book written on this recording alone. What are these sounds, what the hell is going on?! BLAST IT:

 

 

What comes after “Lana Del Rey” in your music library?

This is pretty amusing, and i just realized it. In my CDs, Martin Denny comes next, and in my iTunes, Les Baxter comes next. Les Baxter and Martin Denny were contemporaries in the 1950s, together pioneering the genre known as Exotica. A lot of Martin Denny’s albums are comprised of Les Baxter compositions. Their names are virtually inseparable.   

 

Put your iPod/music library on shuffle and tell us which 10 songs are played. Don't skip, don't cheat!

My ipod is only 8 gigs, so it is not very representative. 

 

Ennio Morricone - Giornata Nera Per L’Ariete

Van Dyke Parks - The Eagle And Me

Giorgio Gaslini - Tentazione Bianca

Ge Gan-ru - Four Studies of Peking Opera, Movement II

The Murmaids - He’s Good To Me

Faxed Head - I Saw Into The Grave Grave 

Andre Popp & His Orchestra - La Cumparsita 

The Beach Boys - Do You Like Worms?

American Spring - Fallin’ In Love

Tom Waits - November

 

What are the small things in life that make you happy?

Sometimes certain lighting, sometimes a passing sentence spoken or in print, the little nuances of a relationship, food, baby animals, things like finding a piece of furniture in the middle of the woods. 

 

(SH: This artsy movie is really coming together.)

 

What do you think your purpose is? Are you happy with where you are in life?

Some days i think i convince myself that it’s to create music. Other days i think my only purpose is to be alive, to experience. I am neither happy nor unhappy with where i am in life. That sounds very Eastern. I am actually very Western. Maybe i’m not very anything. I am stardust like everyone else. 

 

What is a characteristic / trait you see in others that you wish you had?

More patience and less anxiety. 

 

What are your pet peeves / deal-breakers when it comes to friends/relationships?

I don’t think it works like that. It’s never just all hanging on this one little off-putting quality. 

 

(SH: Sass is pulling us apart, though )

 

What would you say is your favorite physical trait + personality trait in potential partner?

Physical trait: aura. Personality trait: peculiarity. 

 

(SH: )

 

BONUS: Is there anything you'd like to tell the community of LanaBoards?

Wait, where am i again? Let me tell you about which two dead people i’d have over for dinner and what we’d eat... 

 

 

[Sitar 22,210]

Separate from the interview but relevant: I listened to the Kristallnacht song and feel like swan-diving off a balcony. Which is really my favorite musical reaction.

[Chris Cuomo 3,320]

This interview was too perfect. I really enjoyed reading it. Congrats, Monicker!

[Hellion 993]

Oh, Monicker!   How I adore thee. 

[lola 6,640]

That first song is so unsettling and depressing and brings up so many visuals from history lessons and the jewish badge only makes it worse. The second song is so weird but cool. It sounds like they have ADHD and Tourettes or something.

[Allie 184]

Great interview! I definitely loved the part about career and dream job, I think exactly like that and I never could get people to understand why. What I like to do is draw, so people (that know about my obsession) tell me all the time that I should go to an art school and all of that, getting really confused about what I actually study. My brother is always telling me that I should post them online or sell them. I get scared to consider. Literally, every single detail is out there with a price nowadays. I guess it's up to personality, some people deal better with sharing their personal stuff and that's lucky of them. Thanks for that quote, by the way.

 

In one of my job interviews, they asked me what I had to get better at, when it comes to myself. I said exactly being more patient (even though I'm a calm person, I just walk away easily) and being less anxious. I know that feel, unfortunately. 

 

Ennio Morricone is a god, to be honest. 

 

The recommended songs are great! I'll add the first one to the playlist I use to draw to, that's going to help for fresh inspiration. The second is one of the nicest little songs from a girl band I've heard. Also, the name of the song. Freaking awesome, like, Egyptian Shumba. Come on.

 

And I didn't know about the cover, man. It's great, I listened to it while reading the interview. Couldn't help but download, creep much? I apologize, but the instrumental is too good as well. Anyway, congrats on the interview!  

[Mariann 255]

Brilliant! I love reading these interviews. Congratulations, Monicker! 

[DUKE 2,530]

Amazing interview! I think I fell in love with Monicker.

[evilentity 13,343]

The aggregate of my posts, i can tell you right now, is far more personally revealing than what will come of this interview. That is the best way to get to know me, through my ramblings on various topics on here. So, if you truly desire to know what’s behind the S&M mask, just go back to my posts and catch all the ways in which i have veered wildly off topic.

TL;DR - Monicker: Please creep me.

 

I blew my nose a lot, coughed, sneezed, drank a lot of water, ate a lot of garlic, thought about music ideas, listened to music, dawdled on the internet, had a phone conversation, had quick sex, made food, made contact with a spirit world, washed the dishes.

No drinking sweat?

 

What's something not many people know about you or that we would be surprised to learn about?

I generally dislike sass. I think internet forums are insane.

Tell us something we don't know. :sassyemote:

 

I do odd things here and there.

Basically you do anything on Craiglist. $100 a pop.

 

I’ll tell you what my dream job isn’t: music. I have no desire to mix my passion with business. It makes no sense to me. It’s not a dream, it’s a bad idea. Schedules, deadlines, compromises, answering to others, etc. Your livelihood dependent on your art? Your art responsible for ensuring your paycheck? That’s insanity. Music is too sacred to me to try to capitalize on it. The 20th century American composer Charles Ives once said, referring to why he chose to work in insurance rather than make a living as a composer, “If a composer has a nice wife and some nice children, how can he let the children starve on his dissonances?”

What if you could still earn a living making music without bending to someone else's timetable or aesthetic tastes?

 

i will never have kids

You mean there will never be any little masked Manickures running around touching their dicks in the dark to images of feet?

 

For whatever reason, all the boys loved Cameron’s dad.

The boys, the girls, they all love Cameron's dad...

 

He looked like Clark Kent and he drove a convertible Corvette

Now I see why you're so into Lana. #DaddyIssues

[evilentity 13,343]

Fucking quote limit...

We would eat, hmmm, i don’t know, maybe something Paleolithic because a) there are some great meals that can be thrown together using a Paleolithic diet, and b) the Neanderthal would like that, right?

Actually, I think the Neanderthal would side-eye you the whole time for your opposition to killing animals for fur and meat.

 

Which Lana album is your favorite?

A to the K to the second A

Don't you mean "A 2 THA MF K", eh?

 

Favorite Lana song? Why?

I guess if i had to pick one, Lolita... Any way you slice it, the melodies are really great and it has interesting ideas running throughout it. It’s infallible too, no matter what arrangement it’s given (and we’ve heard five arrangements of it to date) it just remains a great song.

I love "Lolita", but the arrangement/production on the album version makes it the worst track on Born to Die. Yes, Sitar, even worse than that saccharine auto-tuned whale shit.

 

What are your pet peeves / deal-breakers when it comes to friends/relationships?

I don’t think it works like that. It’s never just all hanging on this one little off-putting quality.

...unless that one little off-putting quality is having ever been into W.A.S.P. or Creed.

 

What would you say is your favorite physical trait + personality trait in potential partner?

Physical trait: aura feet. Personality trait: peculiarity interest in having their nails painted.

FIFY

[PrettyBaby 2,219]

Congrats, Monicker! I will forever revere your taste in music (but there's no way I'm listening to scary music that scares someone who's not scared of scary music). Can't wait to check out The Tammys, and perhaps discover who that guy in the picture with them is, and why they look so annoyed.

 

Note to self: When staging a fake sass-fight on LanaBoards, do not involve Monicker...

[Baby V Alex 2,859]

had quick sex

 

I can't picture u having quick sex, I mean all the fetiches and the S&M mask, no sir, don't break my fantasy

 

*I'm going to continue reading this, give me a moment, cause I'm in shock*

 

Edit: 

The "Dream Job" Answer is just amazing, it's the best answer ever, monicker I'm bowing you, with tears in my eyes.

 

Edit 2:

 

Best answer ever award please:

 

What are your hobbies?

Do i have hobbies? Masturbating? I mean, come on, look: An activity done regularly in one’s leisure time for pleasure. Although over the years, more and more it’s become kind of perfunctory and obligatory. Most of the time it’s probably more out of habit and for procrastination than anything else. I’m kind of over it at this point. Have i said too much?    So, i don’t know, taking walks? Looking out my  kitchen window? Yoga? Painting nails? Everything else that i do i am too invested in to be considered a hobby.  

 

(SH: That's better   Okay so the main point of this is that you masturbate a lot and you're a #DirtyOldMan but yoga, really? Mo's already answered the questions and I'm talking to thin air but wow)

 

 

We can try to top that answer but we will never succed

EDIT 3:

 

OMG Monicker touching an adult's balls when he was 5 

 

[this is going to be a long ride, so just sit and relax]

 

EDIT 4:

 

FLAWLESS describes you and you will deal, sir

 

EDIT 5:

 

I LOVE THE INTERVIEW, I LOVE MONICKER (even when he hate sass   )

 

Great answers, and a really good twist to MOTW, it's my fave interview. 

 

Monicker I hope you get well pretty soon 

[Monicker 3,035]

I loved reading all these responses, made my day, y'all are great. And that was a very glowing intro, Sitar, thanks. But what's the abuse of the sound-bite rule? I don't understand. 

 

 

 

Great interview! I definitely loved the part about career and dream job, I think exactly like that and I never could get people to understand why. What I like to do is draw, so people (that know about my obsession) tell me all the time that I should go to an art school and all of that, getting really confused about what I actually study. My brother is always telling me that I should post them online or sell them. I get scared to consider. Literally, every single detail is out there with a price nowadays. I guess it's up to personality, some people deal better with sharing their personal stuff and that's lucky of them. Thanks for that quote, by the way.

 

In one of my job interviews, they asked me what I had to get better at, when it comes to myself. I said exactly being more patient (even though I'm a calm person, I just walk away easily) and being less anxious. I know that feel, unfortunately. 

 

Ennio Morricone is a god, to be honest. 

 

The recommended songs are great! I'll add the first one to the playlist I use to draw to, that's going to help for fresh inspiration. The second is one of the nicest little songs from a girl band I've heard. Also, the name of the song. Freaking awesome, like, Egyptian Shumba. Come on.

 

And I didn't know about the cover, man. It's great, I listened to it while reading the interview. Couldn't help but download, creep much? I apologize, but the instrumental is too good as well. Anyway, congrats on the interview!  

 

 We are two peas in a pod. 

 

No drinking sweat?

 

No, it's, like, 25 degrees! Save that for the middle of summer   



What if you could still earn a living making music without bending to someone else's timetable or aesthetic tastes?

 

 

That still leaves the fact that you have to depend on your art for your livelihood. It's about that dependency, that relationship between what you love to do and what you need to do. I think that (unfavorably) changes the mindset when approaching your creativity. I want the process of creating music to be a freeing, personal thing, not a job, no matter how lax or ideal the job may be.

 

Also, to elaborate a little on what i meant by hoping that i never have a career: I've never had a career-oriented mindset, that's just not where i'm coming from, it's a different world to me. I don't ever want to be a person who is driven and consumed by their career. I don't want any career to be my life. 

You mean there will never be any little masked Manickures running around touching their dicks in the dark to images of feet?

 

Never. Can you say vasectomy? 

 

The boys, the girls, they all love Cameron's dad...

 

 

OMG, my tea spilled out of my mouth as i read this, haa. 
 

 

...unless that one little off-putting quality is having ever been into W.A.S.P. or Creed.

 

 

Never 4-get it. 

 

 

Physical trait: aura feet. Personality trait: peculiarity interest in having their nails painted.

 

 

I like that! Should've gone with that answer. It would be really rough if i dated a girl who felt weird about her feet and wasn't into manicures & pedicures. Don't even wanna think about it. Brrr. 

 

 

 

Separate from the interview but relevant: I listened to the Kristallnacht song and feel like swan-diving off a balcony. Which is really my favorite musical reaction.

 

That's a good reaction. 

 

 

 

The second song is so weird but cool. It sounds like they have ADHD and Tourettes or something.

 

Haa, it does. Never thought of it as sounding like Tourettes. Those girls are wild. They could eat all the rock & roll boys alive. Proto Feminist Rock. 

 

 

 

Can't wait to check out The Tammys, and perhaps discover who that guy in the picture with them is, and why they look so annoyed.

 

That's a DJ named Clark Race, he supported them a lot. The woman on the left is the sister of the great Lou Christie, who actually wrote Egyptian Shumba (though he didn't produce it) and discovered The Tammys. His sister, Amy, was their manager! They look annoyed because they're bad asses. Look how awesome they are:

 

 This is how i (wish i) look when i dance to Egyptian Shumba in my kitchen. 

 

 

 

Monicker I hope you get well pretty soon 

 

Thanks, BVA, but i turned in my interview some time ago, so i'm not sick anymore...Sitar just took his little time posting it because...HE'S BASIC. 

 

You like dat sass? 

[Baby V Alex 2,859]

Thanks, BVA, but i turned in my interview some time ago, so i'm not sick anymore...Sitar just took his little time posting it because...HE'S BASIC. 

 

You like dat sass? 

 

 

Love every inch of it

[Jord 3,481]

The interview was amazing, you are very smart as I had already seen around. Congrats for being chosen as the member of the week!

[Viva 3,169]

 

[Hundred Dollar Bill 21,804]

 

If your balls were a celebrity couple, who would they be?

SitarHero and Hundred Dollar Bill? 

 

 

 

Recommend us a song (can’t be top 40/popular) that we just have to listen to!

This is a tough one. How can you recommend just one song? This is stressing me out. All right, fine, i got one, sorry this is gonna be a downer. So, i listen to a lot of what many people would consider “scary” music, lots of intense 20th century composition that came about as responses and reactions to war and atrocities, as well as ’50s - ’70s film scores, stuff that makes modern horror movie music sound like easy listening. So, i don’t know if it’s because i am very accustomed to it, but music never scares me in that sort of typical way that people think of when they think “scary music.” There are two exceptions to this, though--two songs that get me every time, that give me the chills and kind of put me on edge, though both do it in two very different ways. I’ll pick the one that has the more profound impact on me. It’s called Shtetl (Ghetto Life) and it's by John Zorn. It’s the first song from his album Kristallnacht, which is, to use a silly term, a “concept album” about the night of broken glass. It’s frighteningly evocative and unsettling and it usually imposes this deep, sinking feeling in me. How this piece of music is able to capture such a palpable sadness and horror, and convey it so effectively through music, that at times is still so beautiful, is pretty remarkable:

 

 

What a song. I really can't think of any clever ways to describe it, but it was really interesting and I enjoyed listening to it. Thanks for sharing!

 

 

All right, i can’t leave you guys like that with that one. Let me cheat and give you another one. This one’s really fun and insane, a real piece of gold. In my opinion it’s one of the best recordings in the history of pop music. The Tammys were an early ’60s girl group and in 1963/64 they released the absolutely bonkers song Egyptian Shumba. There was nothing like it before nor has there been anything like it since. The arrangement is bizarre and really inventive, the production is adventurous and uncompromising, the performance is totally wild and unhinged, almost reckless. The needles must have all been in the red, the equipment probably going up in smoke. This song makes the frenetic energy of early Rock & Roll records by the likes of Little Richard and Jerry Lee Lewis sound like funeral dirges. Egyptian Shumba tears your head off and throws it in a river...while you’re still dancing to it. There should be an entire book written on this recording alone. What are these sounds, what the hell is going on?! BLAST IT:

 

 

OMG MONICKER, DANCE WITH ME TO THIS SONG PLEASE. 

[evilentity 13,343]

Can you say vasectomy? 

                      :airplease: 

 

Excuse me while I create a Kickstarter project called "Monicker vasoepididymostomy fund".

[Auto-Tuned Loon 650]

Can you say vasectomy? 

You had this done so you could slut around without consequence, didn't you? You SLUT!

[Ben Mawson 369]

Are you the leaker?

I would make Ben and Chloe proud.  

Can you say vasectomy? 

Well, I guess I won't have to worry about any leaks from Monicker.